For some brides to be writing their guest list can be one of the most stressful parts of planning their wedding. Trying to keep everyone happy, figuring out who you “should” invite and staying within the numbers you can afford can be exceptionally mind-boggling. In an attempt to remedy this, I have compiled a series of steps for you to follow along with some food for thought at the end. It has worked so far for me so I hope it will for you too!
1. Work out how many guests you can afford
It is critical that this is your first step. You need to know how many guests you can comfortably pay for, and stick to this number. Another consideration is the maximum number of guests your venue can hold.
2. Write a 1st draft with your partner
Either separately or together, you should sit down with your husband to be and write out a rough list of all those you want to have at your wedding. Just do a quick brainstorm and get the names down on paper. Then, discuss each guest and make sure you’re both happy with them being on the list. Any disagreements or guests you’re not sure about should be placed on the ‘maybe’ list and discussed later.
3. Consult Your Parents
Whether or not your parents are paying for all or part of your wedding it is still polite to discuss your guest list with them. They might have some people up their sleeve who have slipped your mind. Although, it is important to respect your parents’ decisions, bare in mind that this is your wedding and not theirs. If they are being forceful/overpowering with your guest list just kindly remind them that your numbers are limited and you want to invite those most important to you.
4. Confirm ‘definites’ and ‘maybes’
Now you’ve spoken to everyone you should have a clear idea who your definites are. If the number of definites matches the number of guests you can afford then you’re done! If you have room to spare it’s time to have another look at your maybe list. As cruel as this sounds you are literally going to have to rank your guests in order of preference. Think about who you know best, who you’re closest to and who you would prefer to have as part of your big day.
We’ve covered the main steps to go through so now here’s a few other things to think about:
Will you be inviting any? Everyone has a different opinion on this. Personally, I’m not inviting any children to my wedding. I feel it’s a long day for them, they’re likely to get bored and I want the parents to be able to relax. The youngest guest I’m inviting is my sister who will be 12. Now, some folks can’t imagine their wedding without children. It’s totally up to you but take the time to consider it.
Family Comes First
Love ‘em or hate ‘em they’re your family. Families fall out more than any other social group but most of the time these fall outs are only temporary. Think carefully before you exclude any family from your guest list. You don’t want to look back in a few years and regret not inviting them.
If you’re still torn up about some people not making it on to your definite list there is generally always room to invite additional guests to the evening reception. Most venues have space for extra guests after the meal has been served.
So there you have it. My tips for making guest lists less stressful! Do you have any additional advice?
Are you struggling with your guest list? Let me know in the comments below and I’ll do my best to help!